You have to work hard to find someone you really want and really like – or, as one married male friend put it, “someone normal” (apparently normal men are in short supply).The search is a kind of journey, and along the way you tend to learn a few things about yourself, and about the society we live in. Everyone knows lots of fabulous single women in their 40s …but can’t think of any equally fabulous single men the same age.Perhaps you were in a live-in or long-term relationship that ended, so you’re single again.As a dating coach for women over 40, I know finding love the second time around (or even the first) is not easy.It’s a well known fact that every single woman drops at least 10 pounds the minute she becomes recently separated. She gets upset and is unable to eat frequently, she’s stressed about the unknown, the attorney fees, and how her kids are doing. Most people would say they feel confident, sexy, that they love the feeling of their clothes practically falling off of them. ’ I looked in the mirror one day and I felt really, really old and tired. I didn’t feel like I was attractive on the inside or outside. I was a stay at home mom: I hadn’t had a job in 6 years.
My kids were on vacation with my ex, so I had no child care issues. When I walked into the bar, my friend came rushing over to me.Your First Relationship After Divorce - After things have started to settle down, you'll probably consider dating again at some point in time.And while it may not last, the first relationship you have with a new man can do a lot to heal your wounded soul.It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single, attractive, heterosexual woman over the age of 40 must be in need of a man.Or so Carrie Bradshaw would have you believe; and she is mostly right.Still, people fall in love every day and many of my clients do find that loving man. This might seem harsh, but you are likely telling yourself several lies about love after 40 that are hurting you.